Snugs and The Man: Family

Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts

6 Months

Dear River,

I cannot believe that you are 6 MONTHS OLD already! Where the heck has the time gone!? In honor of this wonderful milestone, I thought we would take a quick look back over these last 6 months:

Where You Have Been:

Denver, CO

Red Rocks, CO

Las Vegas, NV

Los Angeles, CA

Holidays You Have Celebrated:

Halloween

Thanksgiving

Christmas

New Years

Things You Like To Eat:

Butternut Squash

Winter Squash

Carrots

Peas (...sort of...)

Spinach

Apples

Pears

Mangos

Peaches

Turkey

Chicken

Your Tricks:

Rolling over...and over...and over

You smile and laugh A LOT

You babble and have plenty of conversations

You can sit up (with a little bit of help)

You love to make a motor boat sound with your mouth

You put EVERYTHING in your mouth

Your Favorite Things:

Mom and Dad (obvs)

Pulling Mom's hair

Roary the Lion

Scout the Dog

Your "Command Center"

Books

How You Have Grown:

You are such a beautiful soul River; so kind hearted and full of light. It is an absolute pleasure and gift to be your parents.

We love you buddy

Love,
Mom and Dad

Why Mommy Guilt is like a Drive By Shooting

My son is just a week shy of 6 months.

And guess what, The Switch has happened.

The Switch you ask?

YES! The glorious switch from simply Milk Supply to Mommy.

I don't know exactly when it happened, but it was right around the time I helped my baby through his very first ear infection, (which consisted of 4 trips to the pediatrician, two different medications, and a full blown body rash due to an allergic reaction.) Freaking wonderful. However, now on the other side of that damned childhood curse, I find that he lights up even brighter when I walk into a room, he reaches for me when I am close enough, he does that cute open mouthed "I'm going to eat your face off" type of kissing babies do, and pretty much loses his mind whenever we play together.

It. Is. Awesome.

I. LOVE. it.

Of course don't mistake me, Robert is still his best friend...by a long shot... it's so obvious... but I am MOMMY, which pretty much makes me a superhero.

And yet, I have come to discover that if there is one sure fire nemesis to Mommy Superherodom, it is the dreaded "Mommy Guilt." Our very own Kryptonite.

But I have also discovered something else...

"Mommy Guilt" exists because we, as mothers, hurl it on one another. We do the perpetuating.

Like a drive by shooting, we take to the blog world (Hello!), and social media, and do our own drive by guilting, perhaps, without even realizing it.

And you know what, we are killing ourselves; and killing one another's confidence in the process.

Let's be real, being a parent is HARD ENOUGH on it's own without feeling the pressure of so many opinions on top of it. And the clincher is that it starts before you are even a PARENT!!

"Why don't you have children yet?"

"Don't you feel like that is a little selfish?"

"When are you planning to get pregnant?"

"Natural or Medicated?"

"Vaccines, no vaccines?"

"Breast milk or formula?"

"Cry it out or coddle?"

"Public, Private, or Home School?"

Honestly, I could keep going.

I can remember vividly the first time I experienced that shameful Mommy Guilting. I was pregnant...newly pregnant...and I was asked what type of birth I wanted to have.

Me: "You know...I think I would really like to try giving birth naturally."

Friend: "...Why?"

Me: "Um.. I don't really have a set reason, it's just a preference."

Friend: "Is...it, like, something you need to prove to yourself?"

Me: "No, not at all."

Friend: "Hm."

Annnnnd Shame.

I am 100% sure that she never, in her wildest dreams, meant to hurt, shame, or offend me, but because it has become such common place to have the "right" to share our opinions, it happened regardless...

Perhaps it is because I am Doula, or work in the realm of pregnancy in general, but it seems like I am constantly questioned about my pregnancy and parenting preferences and choices, and why I do or don't do certain things, or why I feel or don't feel certain ways. And truthfully, I love giving MY opinions and MY advice, but that is just the thing, they are MINE...opinions and advice that are now ONLY given when asked, and come with the very serious preface that they are free of judgement and that they do not fit every child.

::gasp!::

See, in my arrogance, prior to becoming a parent, I had an opinion about everything. I swore up and down that I would (or would not) do X,Y, and Z...told women why you should or should not do this or that, and you know what I discovered: Some things sound great in theory, and are terrible in practice.

And I also discovered, that I lended to the guilting of many a mother in the process.

TRUTH.

Parenthood is about grace upon grace (for YOURSELF) and as much humility as you can muster. It is perfectly ok to have your opinions, and even admirable to have done your research on said opinions...but please remember they are YOURS, and it is ok if others do not agree with you.

Furthermore, Mothers, can we please refrain from flagrantly flouting our opinions in open forums like facebook, twitter, and other social media sites? It's just...poor practice. We, as mommies, need as much encouragement and confidence as we can get...especially from one another.

Caring for a HUMAN, nay, being solely responsible for a human, is hard hard work. It is beautiful and crippling all at the same time.

So please, have your opinions, give your perspectives, but please PLEASE do it respectfully.

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal." 1 Cor. 13:1

Snugs out.

River:1; Rice Cereal: 0

Dear River,

Today you tried Rice Cereal for the very first time! I cannot believe how fast you are growing! What is happening!? (Don't tell anyone, but your dad and I gave you a little taste of Rice...Pudding...prior to this. However, like I said, it was a VERY little taste, so it doesn't really count.)

Below you will find your adventure as told through pictures. I think it is safe to say that Rice Cereal gets a big thumbs up!

Glad you enjoyed it buddy.

We love you.

Love,
Mom and Dad

Brie and the Grizzly Affair

Allow me to set the stage.

This morning The Man and I took River to the pediatrician to check out a problematic cold that has been sticking around for the last few days or so. Seeing as how tomorrow we are getting on a plane for Thanksgiving break, we wanted to try and knock this thing out beforehand if at all possible.

You know...

Perhaps it was the upcoming holiday rest bit...

Perhaps it was the buzzing waiting room...

Perhaps it was even the significant lack of sleep both The Man and I have been experiencing lately.

But whatever the culprit, Robert and I were quite happy sitting in that doctor's office. Slap Happy that is.

As we waited for River's name to be called, The Man and I began to joke about potential future baby names. The more outrageous the name, the louder we laughed.

The Man: "No babe, sorry but our next son is going to be named Grizzly. Case closed."

Me: "Uhhhh.... no. First of all, we cannot have a son named River...and then a son named Grizzly. Second of all, his nickname would be Griz. Third of all, there is NO WAY we are naming him Grizzly.. that's like naming the poor kid ROCK."

....LITERALLY two seconds later....

[The Nurse emerges]

"WOLFE?" she calls out.

I kid you not, the woman and little boy sitting DIRECTLY across from us get up!!

I could have DIED.

To make matters worse, I was so mortified that I nervously began to laugh as they passed by us...then I nervously began to laugh so hard that I started CRYING! Which only made Robert laugh even harder than he already was.

Moral of the story?

#BrieFail

That's A Wrap

Ok, confession.

Currently, I am en route to purchase some brass beads for my husband's...BEARD. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, his beard. And here in lies the confession...I love it.

To know my husband is to know that he is creative when it comes to his appearance and his style. He knows what he likes, and that's that. When we first got married, I couldn't figure it out. I chalked it up to possible restlessness, but I TOTALLY missed the fact that this was expression for him. Once I figured that out, it all made sense. I love that he sticks to basics like a good pair of jeans, a t-shirt and cowboy boots, (his uniform basically) but let's his freedom fly when it comes to his hair, facial hair, and accessories. Honestly, to me, he just looks GOOD.

Well, in this little bead adventure of mine, I noticed upon stepping out of the car, that not only is my son sporting his own beads...an amber beaded teething necklace... But I was displaying a little something myself...

I call her my "Sally Jesse Wrapphiel" and you'll see why:

Upon moving to Colorado I've realized that over the last few months, due to the extremely dry climate, my hair has been looking a little dry itself. So, hearing great things about "retraining hair" (ie: spacing out washings in order to allow your hair's natural oil to replenish your hair) I decided to give it a go.

The biggest downside?

Excessively oily hair between washes at the beginning....gross. Therefore, I began to scour the internet for options. I have always been in awe of the beautiful ways black women incorporate scarves and head wraps into their wardrobe, so I wanted to see if there was a way I could possibly incorporate them into mine?

Therefore, I give you:

Sally Jesse Wrapphiel

So let me recap.

That is:

- one beaded, bearded, husband

- one beaded baby

- and one wrapped mama.

We're just one big Granola family!

But don't worry, I still have heels on ;)

Snugs

Halloween 2013

Some of the greatest memories I have from my childhood are wrapped around, and connected to, the different traditions my parent's instilled in our family. Some of those I hope to infuse into my own little family, and others I hope to create myself (along with Robert of course).

This year, Halloween marked the first calendar holiday we had as a family of 3 vs. just a family of 2. It dawned on me...perhaps later than it should have...that now the tradition making portion of life falls heavily on me (and again, Robert of course). Even though River is only 3 months old, I think it is important to start these sort of things even now. Sure, they will probably morph and change over the next few years until we figure out what works best with our tribe, but figuring those things out is part of the fun; part of the adventure.

Last night, we invited a few of our friends, as well as Grammy and Grandpa J, over to our place to enjoy the seminary's annual chili cook-off. It was too...CHILI... (BA DAP BA BAAAA...) for us to care much about casting our vote for "Best Chili," so we just grabbed our grub and ran. Inside the warmth of our apartment, we all enjoyed our feast, as well as some warm apple cider, before the kiddos headed out to Trick-or-Treat. Robert and I hung back to pass out candy because...well...let's face it, taking a 3 month old Trick-or-Treating is basically Robert and I saying "Hey Jack, GIVE. US. YO. CANDY!"

After the kids finished, they returned back to our place to divvy up their loot, enjoy some more cider and cookies, and veg out a bit to "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown!"

All in all, super fun night. Will any part of last night turn into an annual tradition? Who knows... but right now it sure is fun figuring it all out.

PS: Yesterday also marked 3 months of life for little River. Here's a video for you son. We LOVE being your parents! Keep growing, keep learning, and keep being awesome.

(Obviously couldn't figure out how to turn the camera off at the end there...)
XO

Snugs

Bath Time Lessons...

Being a new mom is crazy. Literally.

I have never felt more and less like myself all at the same time.

I will be the first to admit that I want to be Super Mom.

I want to be the mom that can keep the Pinterest worthy house, cook a lean and mean dinner (every night obviously), look like Miranda Kerr 7 weeks after delivery, and already be devising a plan to teach my infant French before his first birthday.

What!? Sue me.

But I will also be the first to admit that I'm not. I'm not her.

That's right ladies and gentlemen, I AM NOT SUPER MOM.

And you know what, that is O-freaking-K!

In my 7 weeks of motherhood I have:

Been peed on...numerous times.
Caught poop WITH MY HANDS.. that was an adventure.
Laughed so hard I peed my pants....uh, yep.
Been puked on
Been told I was too young to have children, followed up by a grilling of my marital status
Screamed in frustration, "I feel like I live in a giant BUTT HOLE!"
Apologized more times than I can count
Been humbled beyond belief

and

Gained a greater understanding of God and His love than ever before.

The last of that list can sometimes be eye roll worthy. That is what we are suppose to say as Christians right? But just a few weeks ago, I was given insight into one of the biggest lessons I have learned thus far in my relationship with God.

He. Is. There.

This lesson was brought to me courtesy of my husband and my son.

My husband is a HANDS ON dad. And I love him for that. When I was fresh out of the hospital, I sort of felt like I was recovering in a spa. The Man had it handled.

All the way down to bath time.

For whatever reason, bath time made me nervous...real nervous. Maybe it was the fact that the first bath I ever gave River, he screamed the entire time because I accidentally made it ice cold (see, NOT Super Mom), or maybe it was because he was so tiny I was terrified of him slipping right out of my hands? Whatever the reason, I gladly gave bath time duty to The Man while I watched from the sidelines.

One night, I was finishing straightening up the house while The Man began to run the water for River's bath. It was the same routine I'd seen before. When I was finished cleaning, I strolled into the bathroom in hopes of spending a little time with my boys. Expecting that River would be laying on his turtle mat while The Man leaned over the side of the tub, I was surprised when I found them both in the bathtub together. It was River's first REAL bath...no turtle mat, just dad.

I could tell he was nervous, but Robert had him completely secure in his arms. As Robert gradually allowed River's little body to be immersed more and more into the warm water, I saw the alarm and panic sweep into River's eyes. Gently Robert would say,

"It's ok son, you're ok. Daddy is riiiight here. I won't let anything happen to you."

Despite Robert's efforts, River still squirmed and splashed, trying to grasp for anything he could. He didn't yet trust Robert. He had no concept that he was completely safe in his father's arms; that Robert was right there and wasn't going to allow anything to harm him.

That's when I realized that I was looking into a zoomed in version of myself and God. Like River in those first initial weeks, I fail to trust my Father. When He leads me into deeper and deeper water, my first instinct is to panic and flail about; grasping for anything I can in order to feel safe. All the while, my Father is holding me securing in His capable arms whispering.. "My Child, it's ok. You're ok. Daddy is right here. I won't let anything happen to you."

As I watched Robert, I saw that all of his attention, his FULL attention, was on keeping his son safe, while at the same time teaching his son that even when the water gets deeper, he is RIGHT there.

[...and when the oceans rage, I don't have to be afraid, because I know that you Love me. Your love never fails...]

I think for the first time I understood God's love as a capitol "F" Father. And to my shame, I think I understood Him for the first time as MY Father; my Father who LOVES me. When the waters of my life get deeper, when I am being matured and things are getting scarier, He is RIGHT there. He is always right there.

We still have River's turtle mat, but we never use it. Now River LOVES real baths. He fully and completely trusts Robert, down to the point that he falls asleep in his arms absolutely every single time.

I want that.
I want that kind of trust with my Heavenly Father.
So...I guess it's time I give up my own little turtle mat...

;)

Snugs

4. I Had a Baby

I Had a BABY

This is perhaps the post I have simultaneously looked forward to writing about the most and the least of all my posts on this blog.

The most because, HELLO!!

and the least because I have no idea how to possibly put into tangible words just how ecstatically happy The Man and I are; how hopelessly in love The Man and I are, and how speechless we are that we brought this incredible little human being into this world.

World,

Allow me to introduce you to my SON;

River Daniel

Born 07.31.2013

6lbs,7oz

All boy.

I have yet to decide if I will share my birth story on the blog, but I will say it was one of the most incredible, intense, scary, and empowering things I have ever had the privilege to be allowed to do.

So.

Would I do it again?

absolutely.

"There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, a Holy habitation for the Most High."Psalm 46:4

Oh, the Snow!

This morning we woke to an overnight blizzard.

And the whole family, even Penny Lane, got in on the fun!

Snugs

The Life, The Life

OK, can I tell you guys something freaking cool!?

This past weekend, The Man and I (and the little babe) were asked to participate in one of the coolest opportunities I have ever been a part of.

The month of January through the beginning of February is known as "Sanctity of Life" month. It is a month devoted to giving those the chance to stand up for life in light of Roe vs. Wade being passed 40 years ago.

This past Sunday I was asked to be an ultrasound model for a live ultrasound that was going to be shown on a large screen during every service at our church. So there I was, in a closed room, behind the stage with just the sonographer and Robert.

The Community Director of Alternatives Pregnancy Center took the stage to speak about their services, what Sanctity of Life Sunday entailed, and then we were on.

A screen rolled down, and the entire congregation was given the opportunity to see the little life alive inside my belly.

A fully formed baby at just 13 weeks.

Above you can see the backs of my dad and mom's head...seeing their grandchild for the very first time!

And here are some "behind the scenes photos" ;)

And how about a little live action?

Afterward, a few families came up to Robert and I thanking us for being willing to do something like a live ultrasound. We were told how many of their children and teen's eyes were just glued to the screen seeing a little baby in the womb for the very first time. Others told us how their children had so much fun pointing our our baby's little hands, or belly, or feet.

I was one proud mama.

Snugs

(12 1/2 weeks)

Snuglet/Snuglette....GUESS WHAT!?

OK.

So, there is a V E R Y good explanation as to why I haven't blogged in a few weeks.

Simply put, I was afraid I would spill my guts all over the blogsphere.

Therefore, I played it safe and took a quick sabbatical before I could say anything about being....

P R E G N A N T ! ! !

That is right ladies and gents, Snugs and The Man are expecting their very own little snuglet[te] later this year, and we are absolutely over the moon with excitement.

See, here's the thing... The Man and I have known for what seems like forever, but because we were moving to Colorado (where my parents live) and taking a trip to the south (where his parents live) we wanted to wait until we were able to tell both of our families in person.

And boy (or girl) was it worth the wait!

First of all, before I go into that, here are some snaps from the day we found out.

Ok next.

Here is how we told MY parents...

Anyone remember this lil' guy from a post or two ago?

Well, my mom fell in L.O.V.E with this when she saw it on my blog (little did she know we already bought it). She hounded me for weeks about just buying it and putting it in storage

...yadda yadda yadda...

...heh heh heh...

WELL, The Man and I decided to wrap this up, as well as a framed picture of our first ultrasound, and give it to them when we all celebrated Christmas together in Colorado. It was the last gift we had them open, and Robert and I had a ball as we watched my parents dig into the wrapping, and let the information slowly wash over them until...